The Past Resurrected
by sparkyCSI
Summary: [One Shot] My musings on something that was said in S3 epidsode 3. MAJOR SPOILERS FOR EPISODE 3. Don't say I didn't warn you! Please read and review!


**Disclaimer: **_Sadly, I own nothing but my own thoughts! So CBS please don't sue me! I don't have anything but student loans!_

**AN:**_This is my take on what happened between DL in Episode 3. SPOILERS INSIDE! This is from Lindsay's POV. Please read and review...My muse loves reviews and might be tempted to revisit this story again, if there is enough interest!_

**The Past Resurrected**

Lindsay Monroe sat on her couch at home. She and Danny had just solved the case about the waitress who had been killed by her boyfriend in a fit of rage. She looked down at the mug of tea in her hand, beating herself up for leading Danny on.

"God, Linds. You can't do anything right. Did you see the look in his eyes? Damn it." She raised her head so that she was staring up at the ceiling. "I can't do anything right anymore." With those simple words, the tears began to roll down her face.

She put the tea down before she could drop it. She signed in despair. The depression that had been keeping her company ever since the flash bomb went off threatened to overwhelm her. She could still hear Danny's last words to her as she walked away. "If there's anything you need from me, just let me know. Okay?"

Little did he know how much those words sliced into her heart. "I just wish I could Danny," she had thought as she rounded the corner. "How did I get here? How did I hurt the one man that has broken down my defenses?"

As she put her head down on her knees, she thought back to the girl she once was.

(Flashback, Montana, days before Lindsay's high school graduation)

Lindsay was riding her horse, Dante like she always did when she was nervous. She was trying to finish writing her valedictorian speech. All the sudden she felt a chill. That was when she knew that something was wrong. She knew that Laura was in trouble. She turned Dante towards the house and urged him to gallop as fast as he could.

Halfway home, she heard the sirens. "Oh, God. Laura!" She lowered herself over Dante's neck and amazingly the horse responded, gathering even more speed. She felt a piece of her heart was missing.

When she finally arrived at the two story house where she grew up, she could do nothing but stare at the flashing red and blue lights. In shock, she saw the medical team wheeling a stretcher out of the house, which a sheet covering the body. "NO!" she screamed as she jumped off the horse.

She ran towards the stretcher, not knowing what to believe. The police chief, Marvin Hill, grabbed her as she tried to run past him. She fought him trying to see if it was her twin sister on the stretcher. "Let me go! Let me go! Laura! Laura!" Chief Hill still prevented her from going beyond the crime scene tape. She began to scream profanities at him. Language she had picked up by hanging around ranch hands.

"Lindsay. Lindsay! Stop it. You can do nothing to help her now." The Chief was trying to break through her hysteria, to calm her down. Finally, once the coroner's van had left their property, Lindsay collapsed on the ground, sobs racking her slender form.

She was still sitting there, sobbing, when her grandparents arrived. "Lindsay?" her grandmother said.

Lindsay looked up through her tears and threw herself into her grandmother's arms. "Nana! I felt her die. I knew that something was wrong, but I was too late to stop it. Why? Why do the people around me have to die?"

Nana hugged her tightly. "Shush, child. It's not your fault. We've talked to Marvin. If you had been here…" Nana trailed off as the emotions choked her. She fought down her own sorrow before continuing. "If you had been here, you would have been killed as well. This was well planned attack. It looks like this was just a robbery gone wrong. Please baby, believe that. You could not have done anything." Nana felt the tears running down her cheeks as she tried to comfort the young woman.

(Graduation Day)

Lindsay sat in the crowd, in the high school auditorium. Her mood, the mood of her fellow graduates, was very somber. Instead of celebrating a milestone in their lives, they were mourning the loss of one of their own. The principal had told her the previous day that she was not expected to make her speech, in order to let her grieve. Lindsay felt little consolation at that thought.

Her mind was obsessed with thoughts of wanting to catch her sister's killer. She knew that when she went to college, she was going to major in political science. She had decided to become a police officer.

She sat, lost in her own thoughts, until her best friend, Angela Morgan urged her to stand up. She numbly followed her up to the stage to accept both her and Laura's diploma. When Mr. Cameron handed her both of the diplomas, nothing but sobs were heard throughout the room. In silence, she accepted them and walked back to her seat.

Immediately after the ceremony, the entire graduating class made their ways to their cars. Both Lindsay and Laura were well liked in the class. They made a somber procession to the church where Laura's funeral was being held.

The class walked in, still dressed in their graduation robes. Once the church was filled, and it was to the point of not even having any standing room, the minister began the service.

The service was short, but poignant and there was not a dry eye in the house. Lindsay and her grandparents watched as 300 students filed passed to closed coffin to pay their respects.

Once the students were done, Lindsay's grandparents paid their respects. Nana stood to the side and watched Lindsay carefully as she made her way to the coffin.

"Hey, Laura. You'd be impressed. The entire class turned out for you." Lindsay's voice broke. "Why? Why did you have leave me? We were supposed to do everything together. We're twins. How am I supposed to survive without you?" Lindsay found herself too choked with tears to continue. She laid Laura's diploma on the coffin, kissed her fingertips and then laid her hand on the coffin. "Good-bye."

The next day, Lindsay packed up her belongings and moved to California to go to school at USC. She declared her major and willed herself to move on with her life.

(Two years later)

Lindsay had begun to heal from her trauma of losing her sister. She was at the top of her class at USC with a 4.0 GPA. She pursed her dream of becoming a police officer with zeal. She was determined to be the best that she could be.

She still had her moments of doubt, but she showed that side of herself to no one. Then she met Paul. She was attracted the moment she laid eyes on him. They were so similar but so much different. She was shy, he was outgoing. He loved to joke around, she was serious. Despite the differences they became fast friends.

He was also pursing a political science degree and they both signed up for an internship with the local police department, they began to talk.

Lindsay loved to be with him. He had a way of flirting with her, but joking. It put her at ease. They were inseparable after that summer internship. Over the next year, their relationship grew even deeper and before graduation, they were talking about marriage. Lindsay knew that she had found her soul mate.

Sitting in the auditorium at her college she thought back over the previous four years. _It's amazing the difference four years makes. I can actually smile at this graduation. I thank the heavens that I found Paul. He has helped me move on._

Both of them decided to stay in Southern California. They both got jobs with the Los Angeles police department. Lindsay found that she had a talent for undercover work, while Paul was training to join the S.W.A.T. team.

They planned their wedding and decided to put it on hold for a year while they got comfortable in their jobs. Little did they know what life had in store for them.

(6 months after graduation)

Lindsay suited up for her undercover job. She calmly strapped on the bullet proof vest underneath her close. Her sergeant looked at her carefully. "Are you sure you're ready for this?"

She smiled. "Mitch. You trained me. You wouldn't have asked me to do this if you didn't think that I was ready. It's a simple sting. What can go wrong?"

Mitch laughed. "You're right. Be careful. See you on the other side."

Little did Lindsay know what a prophecy her words would be. She was passing the stolen goods to the dealer when she noticed him looking at her funny. She kept in her personae. "Ya want the stuff or not, man. I ain't got all day."

The man looked at her and she saw the flash of recognition in his eyes. She reacted instantly. She dropped the bag and threw herself out of the line of sight. When the flash bomb went off, she felt her ears ring.

When she got up, she saw that the S.W.A.T. team had moved him. She saw Paul walking towards her; she threw herself in his arms. He held her close, pulling back to check to make sure that she was okay. Both were so lost in the feeling of relief that they did not see the man on the floor picking up a gun.

A single shot rang out and blood spattered over Lindsay's face. She gasped in horror as he fell to the floor, his eyes becoming glazed. "Paul!" The bullet had entered his head at an upward angle passing through his neck. Death was instantaneous.

Soon after the first shot, five more shots rang out as the rest of the team took aim and fired at the prone man. He died soon after the five bullets hit him.

Lindsay just stood there in shock as the love of her life bled out on the floor.

A couple of days later, she was startled when Mitch came to see her. "Lindsay? I have some news for you. It might be hard to hear."

Lindsay raised her red eyes to his. "What's going on, Mitch."

Mitch sighed and rubbed his hand across his face. "We got a hit on the DNA from the man who killed Paul."

"What?"

"It came back to a cold case from four years ago. In Montana."

Lindsay brain refused to process the information she was given. "Huh?"

"Lindsay? This is one of the men who killed your sister."

Mitch saw the overwhelming grief in Lindsay's eyes become rage. "What? How?"

"There were five DNA samples found at your house that day. All of them were unknown. When we ran his DNA it matched one of the samples. The good news is that now we have a lead and the Bozeman crime lab is working to identify the other samples."

Lindsay sat in shock at how an event in California could possibly lead to the resolution of her sister's death. Instantly she knew what she wanted to do. That day, she signed up for her first class in forensic science and began to pursue a degree. She wanted to be one of the people who conclusively put the criminals away.

Nine years had passed since she made her decision. It had taken her only two to get her degree. Once that was obtained, she made her way back to Bozeman, to help process the new evidence in her sister's case. It had taken another year to track down the final assailant, but they had done it.

She had moved on with her life, building a reputation as an outstanding forensic scientist. She vowed never to let herself become involved with another person who worked in law enforcement. She stuck to the vow until her reputation got her the job in New York.

There she met Danny Messer. Office playboy. She found that the more she learned about him, the more he touched her. He reminded her of Paul. They had similar outlooks on life.

Her life came crashing down the day she was in a room with another flash bomb. When Danny pulled her into his arms, she couldn't keep from seeing Paul's face instead of Danny's. For one instant, she felt complete again. She barely remembered agreeing to go to dinner with him. When he reminded her, she didn't have the heart to tell him that she had changed her mind. But once the day came, she realized that she was still not over everything that had happened in her past.

She resolved to break it off, to spare herself more pain. Now she realized, sitting on her couch, that she had just hurt the one man who had managed to break past her defenses.

"Smart, Linds. You just have to screw up your life. What am I going to do?"


End file.
